Lately I have been so moody. My poor kids are wondering what happened to their mom. My super madness goes from 0-60 in no time flat. I don't know what's going on with me. I thought maybe I just needed a break so Robert and I went on a date. Well that worked for about 12 hours then I was back on my Crazy Lady kick. I don't want you all to think that I am out of control, I have just been without any patience for about 2 weeks. Does this happen to anyone else or am I weird? Here are a few things that I think I can attribute it to:
1. Lehi Arts Workshops start tomorrow. The teacher we thought we had for Mom and Tots Music and Movement didn't end up working out. So I am the teacher for that class. I really am excited about it, but I am feeling a little inadequate.
2. We start Miss Lehi Meetings this week. But that is something I am really excited for.
3. I want my singing time to be great each week. I wish I were more creative.
4. I have a 1 year old tornado. I have to clean the house when he's asleep or I don't get anything done. As soon as he wakes up the house is messy again. He also discovered that since he can make his way up onto the cupboard he mind as well open the cupboard and pull all the dishes out. Also, if mommy is working on something he thinks he needs to come and pull all the papers down and throw them everywhere! He does make me smile all day too!
5. I have a sweet 4 year old thatis getting into a "I don't have to if I don't want to" stage, and a "I can't sing quiet this is a loud song" stage. She's getting too smart.
6. My husband goes to school and work. He's gone from 7 a.m. to 6 or 7 p.m. every day. He gets home in time to give me a little break and play with the kids. Helps me put the kids to bed, then he does his homework until 1 in the morning. Where's the wifey time? I know this schedule doesn't look bad to most but he works for someone that is really flexible, so until he started school he was home A LOT more. We were really blessed. It's just been a hard transition.
7. I started this diet, and it's been great. I have loved watching the weight come off. I am down 22 lbs. now. I have had a couple cheat moments on it but for the most part been really good. But I am left most days still feeling really hungry. I'm sure a portion of it is mental but I would do anything for a hamburger from Parkers Drive In.
As I was writing that I was wondering if I am going through a really selfish time. I want the kids to listen, I want Robert home more, I want to be more creative, I want to go have fun, I want to eat more delicious food. My goal this week is to make sure that I care about how the people around me feel more. Sorry if you feel like you are covered in my emotional throw up. It did feel good to get that all out though. Who needs a couselor when you have blog?
DIY Mothers Day Vase
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9 comments:
Don't be so hard on yourself. I think everyone goes through times like these. I know I sure have lately. I seem to go through it every winter. The holidays are over, the fun and parties have pretty much dried up, and we're just left with the daily grind and yucky-stay-inside-all-day weather! It seems if I can make it through February, life seems to look a little brighter after that. One thing that helps me is to pick un upcoming date/fun activity to plan and look forward to. Right now, I'm trying to think of creative ways to celebrate valentines day and I've been trying to come up with a fun date idea for Cam and me and a few fun things to do with the boys. That's helped a little.
Keep pluggin' away. It will get better!
Traci you are too sweet. Believe me it is OK to vent once in awhile. Yes I know you are grateful for the blessing you have but sometimes, it is just nice to be grumpy and share it with others. It makes us feel like OK good your not perfect. That crazy lady believe it hits after the number two kid. That's when I noticed it. So I am sorry you are having such a bad day. But things will get better. Love you guys
I think you look HOT! That alone should help you feel better!! :)
I love you and thanks for coming over last night!!!
Oh sweet Traci, I am sorry you are feeling down. I hope you are better now that you have vented. I have been feeling this way too, I blame it on the winter too.
ALSO with your new diet you are probably going through w/drawls from your favorite foods. CONGRATS on the LBdage los.
I know with the new schedule, no wife time and feeling like you are just way overbooked can really make one feel CRAPPY. Hold your head up high don't sweat the small stuff and remember life is short, make it count.
Oh The house cleaning thing is so overrated! I too started to feel this way after 2 kids but you know I decided it's NOT WORTH It!
I want to be remembered as a fun mom who tried to spend her time with the kids and hubby. One who would stay in her PJs and watch TV all day, who would play playdoh even it the floor was just vaccumed, play barbies even though they make a HIGE mess. I have a livable home and clean it once a week, pick it up daily and that is how it is until kids are older to help.
Don't try to be wonder woman or super mom just be YOU!!!
And w/ the other pressures of the world, work, the economy failing, the recent presidential decisions , and more Just think as my friends say "At least sex is free!" That otta put a smile on your face.
Even the thought of dieting makes me crazy :)
If you'd like some help with ideas for your mom and tot class...I'd be happy to serve as a sounding board.
Also, it is hard to feel like you're husband/daddy is M.I.A. (Missing In Action). It takes a toll, but this too shall pass!
And Talie is right- you do look hot!
Hey Smith fam. I was blog surfing and crossed over you. Sounds like things are good and busy. Send me your email so I can invite you to our blog (kinsrae@aol.com) It will be fun to keep up with you.
Kinslee
By the way- what diet are you on. I could use a good one to get rid of this stuck on baby fat:)
Kinslee
You are a super woman. No wonder you are crazy lady, you are so busy. But only for a moment. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel, just keep looking for it.
Traci you are not alone in your feelings! I can say that from experience and also just looking at what others have written everyone feels this way at one point or another! I think you do a great job at everything you do and sometimes you just have to let yourself realize you aren't super woman and yes, you do need breaks and selfish time! If you take time for yourself you'll be better regrouped to face the hard things at the hard moments! Just remember you're SO loved and we're all here for you to vent to ANYTIME!!!
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