I have a neighbor that works late nights. She lives with her (just barely) 16 year old son in the same building I live in. I told her that I would keep an eye on him and help out where I could. I always know it's him at my door because he likes to ring the door bell multiple times in a row. About 3 months ago he showed up at my door just after 10 p.m. saying he needed salsa. I thought that was kind of late but I blew it off. Last night at 10:50 p.m. Robert had fallen asleep and I was in bed reading getting ready to turn the light off when I heard someone walk to the door and start ringing the doorbell multiple times. I was a little bothered by the late hour that he was showing up at the door but thought that maybe he really needed something. Robert got up and got dressed and went to the door, but he wasn't fast enough so the neighbor started ringing again. I was trying to be calm and forget the fact that I had 2 sleeping children that I really didn't want to have woken up. Robert answered the door and the neighbor boy said, "Could you give my friend a ride home?" Ummmm . . . No! (That was my first response.) He had come over after school and now his parents were in Salt Lake, the neighbor lady was still at work and he needed to get home. He lives about a mile from where we live and being a teenage boy he could probably handle walking. Well Robert said, "Would I make you mad if I said no?" (He's too nice) To which the boy replied, "YES, and my mom will be mad too!" He kept saying that he stayed too late and he would get in trouble if we didn't get him home. Well guess what, there's your consequence and we shouldn't be held resposible for his choices.
We did not end up giving him a ride and I'm sure we have people that are mad at us over it. Did we do the right thing? I love to help people out whenever I can, but there comes a point when you feel like people are taking advantage of your kindness. I am more than happy to help anyone between the hours of 8 a.m. and 9:30 p.m., and if it's an emergency call me anytime. But I feel like that was definitely not an emergency.
What would you have done in that situation? What would you do now? I don't know if his mom even knows that happened. Is he not going to tell her because he wasn't supposed to have friends over that late? I can't get it off my mind. I just am boggled at the fact that he thought would be o.k.!
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I would have done the same thing. Actually Noah would have told him where to go :) He's old enough to know better and that's where I lose patience.
I wouldnt have given him the ride either. I would also talk to the mom as soon as you can to let her know that: 1) The son had a friend over that late and 2) That there are limits on when and for what reason he can bug you (salsa at 10pm is not a valid reason). Good on you, too many enabling parents out there nowadays and people need to learn mroe responsibility.
I can't agree more with Ashley and Jim. I wouldn't have given him a ride either. OR I would have made him call his mom at work, while I listened telling her what he had done, AND then maybe given the kid a ride home. That is crazy SALSA at 10pm... I think you might be being taken advantage of. And his comment about his MOm being mad, did he mean if you didn't give him a ride, or because he was gonna get it b.c he broke the rules? Either way too bad, good job!
I can't agree more with Ashley and Jim. I wouldn't have given him a ride either. OR I would have made him call his mom at work, while I listened din the other phone telling her what he had done, AND then after telling his mom it would ONLY be done once I maybe would have given the kid a ride home.
That is crazy SALSA at 10pm... I think you might be being taken advantage of. And his comment about his MOm being mad, did he mean if you didn't give him a ride, or because he was gonna get it b.c he broke the rules? Either way too bad, good job!
Wow, you are WAY too nice. I totally would have gone off on him. Emergency situations are what that kind of behavior is reserved for, not carelessness. Hopefully, he learns his lesson!
You totally did the right thing. The kid is sixteen. My theory (that makes me feel better when I think I've been too harsh on a 16 year old) is this: if the state deems you old enough to operate a large vehicle, then I deem you old enough to make good choices and deal with consequences when you don't. You can tell his mom if you want, but I don't think I would. Just because I don't think I would. If it happens again, she needs to know. You were totally in the right.
Completely Gawly.
Perhaps they have a history of taking advantage. In my eyes you were kind, neighborly & acted appropriately. Never need to apologize for that.
:)
Oh My Gosh!! I would be soo irritated! I totally agree with what all your friends said!! I would let his mom know that you are there to keep an eye on him and to help out in an EMERGENCY..that is ridiculous to be asking for salsa at 10pm!!! That is something that if you don't have you can live without. I definitely would have said no. That's lame that he said he would be mad & so would his mom if you didn't give his friend a ride home!! Well, then be mad!! It isn't your fault that his friend stayed too late and didn't make arrangements to get home. I hate it when people ring the doorbell a million times...especially if they know you have little kids that could possibly be sleeping at 10 at night! That's just plain rude & inconsiderate!! Common sense these days don't seem to exist! Don't feel bad!!
"Could you give my friend a ride home?" said the petulant youth.
"No, but I can reinforce the norms of polite behavior by telling you no," replied the extremely polite and indulgent neighbors.
"Crap, well guess we'll have to do the normal thing and take care of our late night non-emergency ourselves," muttered the out-of-touch youth.
"Thanks," said society at large.
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